How It's Changed

…And welcome back, I hope you enjoyed that brief commercial smell sensation, didn't that smell delicious? We are happy to be back, beaming directly into your cerebral cortex dnd do we have an exciting uplink for you today. In this segment we are going to delve into the world of ancient technological change. You see, back in homo sapiens sapien period, what they might call the late 20^th century, life was a bit “backwards” for our standards. Imagine a world where you had to use a handheld device to communicate with friends and family?!? And communication with their domesticated pets wasn’t even fathomable for them…haven’t times changed? Now let us examine some of the technology these early humans used in their daily lives…feel free to virtually manipulate these objects to really give you a feel for the clumsiness of their archaic lives. Just don’t do it while transporting as this may cause a fluctuation in your brainwaves resulting in distortion upon re-apparition. We do not want to see any transportation fatalities because of our distractive content. W8 & Concentr8

(cue cheesy 'musac' and warming voice-over)

Here we see one of the devices that “revolutionized” communication…if they only knew, right? They called this a Cellular Telephone, after a previous form, yet similar technology of wired communication. The “Cell Phone” as it became to be known as allowed humans to walk around freely in public whilst continuously communicating directly with an unknown individual on the other end…often times making said individual look like a huge douche-bag to anyone overhearing their very annoying and irrelevant conversations.

Next, let us mentally navigate to this rather large, cubed device, popular amongst these early humans for entertainment and distraction. They called it the “television,” and it operated in a most rudimentary way. The front panel of this cube would emit a patter of colors creating a two-dimensional image of dramatized tele-plays that this “civilization” would then watch for enjoyment. Yes, only two-dimensions! Imagine how much we are amused at only five dimensions, our ten must not have even been found in their futuristic fictional ‘tele-plays’…it is hard to fathom what life must have been like for these depraved souls. Our two-legged ancestors would sit for star-rotations on end, watching semi-humorous, vaguely scripted situational comedies, dramas, or athletic competitions to escape from their mundane, labor intensive sun-rotations.

Now, can you imagine leaving your domicile, and your means of travel is a four-wheeled vehicle that used naturally created, but limited supplied, combustible liquid which propelled gears to create acceleration? If they only knew, right? Maybe hundreds of thousands of these early humans could have lived instead of perishing in the final great war and this, mankind, could have survived the last great technological feat that ultimately lead to their doom…

the “gaming console.” Records show that the first and widely popular gaming device, one that allowed for interchangeable games, was known as the Atari. Later advances found better visual graphics and more comprehensive game play. In addition, any advancement resulted in the increase in average weight, laziness, and academic failure rates which we all know led to the eventual extinction of this once proud race of beings. It truly is an amazement how these gaming consoles, in conjunction with their two-dimensional displaying devices completely engrossed pre-adolescent, adolescent, and ultimately post-adolescent humans in interactive game-play, using such themes as war, auto-racing, mythical warriors, sports, and ironically, futuristic, post-apocalyptic hell-scapes.

How fortunate are we to live in a modern time of collective consciousness, a free existence, and a reality that is devoid of any need of a virtual state. Now be well my fellow siblings and remember to never forget the foibles of our ancestors, least we dare not repeat them.

Generation Gap

I’m calling this my old man rant. I’m far from old, but I am beginning to see the gap between myself and next generation. I have reached a point in my life that I am now twice the age of many graduating seniors. And now that I work in an environment surrounded by the aforementioned youths, I am finding some alarming trends. Yet, I’ve been pondering this one for a while…see, I started back in 2008 when I was attempting to get back into writing (this does not bode well for this to be a continuous venture, if history says anything about my dedication to the medium of writing). So bare with me as I take you back to my first attempt and try to pick it up 4 ½ years later, although much of it still applies…

I know, I know, it has been a while…a long while. Hey, it’s me, you know me. I haven’t changed much, same venue - different room. I’ve been thinking lately, that’s what abnormal amounts of quiet will do to you (that’s why you need to turn the music up loud kids). I’ve got a lot of things on my mind and I needed to reach in there and scoop it out like ice cream - I’ll let you add your own toppings

I figured all my ramblings couldn’t be encapsulated into a single, all-encompassing blog, but I think I might have come up with a theme, it might be a stretch, hang in there with me, hope you are flexible.

So here we are, still in the 0’s but almost out into those fun teen years,’08 to be more precise (at least I hope to be done with thing before the end of the year). Life and technology are moving faster than anyone can keep up with (yes, even you). No amount of doping or HGH will help you keep pace. I have come to observe that even the separation of a few years can greatly characterize where we are in our social interactions. Using myself as an example, and I always assume that I am the norm, deal, I graduated high school in the mid-90’s, attended college thereafter. During that time, the interwebs was coming of age to the general public, beginning in the academic arena. I had access to Netscape, newsgroups, and the beginning of what we called the world wide web (the www for those of you who didn’t know why we have to type that in front of our web address). My major form of communication in college was e-mail (see here for more info). Upon graduation I got my first cell phone (still have the same # I was first issued amazingly enough) and used it sparingly to call friends and family (again, see above link).

…so its now 2012, see much of the above still does applies, sadly. And yes, I still have the same phone number…hit me up! (the end of that sentence just shows you how out of touch I am with the new breed of teenagers) Obviously I did not finish that train of thought at the time, thus is sat on the shelf, collecting dust, allowing time pass, allowing more technology to be invented, and widening the gap between past and present. With technology developing at such an exponential rate, a lot has changed in that time. But with any advances in technology, and far too often, societal changes are not considered for the sake of greater laziness. I’m this has been believed since our grandfathers’ grandfathers experienced life with electricity for the first time, “these elevators are going to make these kids all fat and lazy.” If they only knew how right they were. Thus the reason why I am calling this my old man rant. Now, picking up where my ’08 self left off…

‘12, not yet a teen but in that awkward stage of development when you start noticing “those changes”. I can’t even imagine what life must be like for the youth of today, and I interact with them on a daily basis. One thing is for sure, their cell phones are firmly implanted to their person. If desire is the aspiration of progress, then you’ll be seeing Bluetooth contacts with a heads-up displace of cell phone screens in the not too distant future. (helps that I have already implanted suggested that idea to my student) I crossed out implanted because in the future they are going to implant microchips into our brains so can remember things. Which is a good thing because I read some where that access to all these search engines, looking up information instantaneously, is causing our long term memories to shrink. Until that is accomplished there’s a chance that my students won’t remember my suggestion and we’ll remain left with young, distracted danger-mobiles on our American roads. Let’s hope we all make it out of our teen years.

Don’t get me wrong, many of these advances have provided our population with improved quality of life, longer lives, easier lives, allowing us to do other things with our lives. However, much to the detriment to society, some of these technological advances can create unintended side effects. And if you don’t see the rise in popularity of zombie-themed pop-culture productions as a metaphor for our mindless dependence on technology, then maybe you are one yourself. And that’s today’s word.

Hello, 2007, it's me, 2012.

I step out into the cold, turn up my collar to the brisk wind that swirls in this barren wasteland of modern life. It’s the year, 2012 anno domini – and in this futuristic landscape you’ll find images that would be unrecognizable to my younger eyes, things only a sci-fi film of 2007 could create with computer generated effects. As I look around with amazed bewilderment I see people staring at small, portable devices with screens that emanate bright colors and sounds, unable to tear themselves away long enough even to acknowledge the traffic that is also not acknowledging them as they walk across – what is now seen as a loose interpretation of an intersection (see, in the future, for most, laws are mere suggestions). Well, citizens of 2007, I write to you from the future, a time spiraling out of control toward a vast and powerful worm-hole of technology, greed, and divisiveness. Speaking of…

Politics

Hey, you remember all those movies that were set in “the future” and you knew that because the President of the U.S. was black (it is ok to say black now, as appose to African-American because most black people don’t want to be lumped in with actual African-American – immigrants from Africa. How futuristic is that?!?). Well, the future is here my friends…Barack Obama was elected as the first black president (well, half-black, but it’s a step in the right direction). He was also the first black president to get re-elected, not bad for first timer. And in those movies, the Presidents had to deal with some kind of natural apocalypse threatening to put major cities under water or in a snow-covered wasteland? Well, that almost happened (see “Superstorm Sandy”, even the name conjures up a Roland Emmerich / Jerry Bruckheimer -esque flicks) Some blame the destruction on NYC and NJ on their liberal debauchery and secular tendencies…I blame Snooki and “The Situation” for being, well, Snooki and “The Situation” - that and global warming, speaking of…

Technology

The aforementioned and often commented on cell phone addiction has exponentially worsened. As predicted by yours truly, cellular devices have replaced actually human interaction. Remember when your phones could only make voice calls and send text messages…well now you can ignore people in the virtual world as well, by using your phones to access the internet, check facebook (oh, that’s this site that’s like myspace but easier to use, and now is kind of unpopular amongst the kids because more people are using it…even your parents), oh, and twitter. Speaking of…are we supposed to be interested in what Kathy Griffin thinks of Dancing with the Voice Stars X-Factor? Apparently people do because they’ll emerge themselves in the digital glow of pixels while enjoying a meal in a romantic restaurant with their significant others, who are also emerged in the ambient glow of LED illumination. Speaking of…

Pop Culture 

You know those annoying reality TV shows that dilute your cable TV menu…well, imagine them on steroids…yeah, Lance Armstrong style. The Voice, X-Factor, Dancing with the Stars: All-stars, Undercover Boss, Kitchen Nightmares, American Pickers, Coast Guard: Miami, America’s Next Top Baby’s Daddy: Most Wanted Alimony Avoider Edition. I mean, reality shows that are on channels that have nothing to do with the content of the reality show. Pawn Stars on History Channel? Oh, and the so-called stars of these shows somehow make more money than firefighters, police officers, teachers, factory workers, military personnel…combined (ok, that might be an exaggeration). Of course, if we didn’t watch them, they wouldn’t be on. I blame you 2007, if we had just stopped watching American Idol after they discovered the only 5 talented singers in the country not already discovered, then we would have never gone down this shit-slide of muddled mediocrity.  Speaking of…

This blog

So those blog posts you added in that ancient and archaic year of 2007, maybe you should have done some revising to fix all those grammatical errors, what are you, some kind of uneducated 2012 high school student? Get with the program. Now, if you could give me some advice on how to find that great age of innocence, to remember what makes something humorous, and to find the time to update this thing more than once every 5 years.

2007, my memories of you are fading to an unrecognizable blur of faces and events, like ripples in a pond of time. Your bright optimism and sundrenched world have been replaced with dim pessimism and cloud covered days….wait, 2012 isn’t all that bad. It’s actually pretty awesome. Bet you wish you had access to iPads, self-parking cars, and holograms (ok, that one isn’t here yet, but we’re closer to it than you 2007, ha!) So stay tuned 2007, cause 2013 is just around the corner (if we are all still here – I’m looking at you, Mayans). Get ready for some not-so-humorous, often ridiculous, and definitely erroneous dribble coming to a sundrenched world near you.

It’s All Been Done Before

I know, I know. You are thinking, ‘Rick, where is my dose of humorous exposition on the human culture that has been so absent from my life?’ It has been some time since my last wispy and witty repartee of words, but I have found it difficult lately to bring myself to force good nature and musing on life, culture, and the world. With class, work (don’t get me started – Rick concentrate on happy thoughts – serenity now!), oh, and Iraq, dog mauling, and aging bridges, all make it difficult to pen perky prose. Secondly, what to write on? Work? No. Definitely no. Life? Not much happening right now, in the eye of the storm. Pop culture? Do we need another exposé on over-exposed ex-celebrities? Rehab? Again? If it didn’t work the first two times… Maybe prison will work – wait – isn’t Paris still a snobbish socialite? Anyway…boring same ol’

Speaking of which, I have been thinking of different topics to write on and I came up with the idea of balance, and how life and relationships are all about balance. Guess what? Been there done that. So now I am recycling ideas without even knowing it, that’s scary. Must mean I really believe in that idea. But it brings me back to ideas, makes me wonder how writers come up with shows, movies, stories, books, or….blogs. But more power too them. I am not one to reflect or ponder life’s mysteries or keep a running self-dialog, journal, or diary. And far too often my thoughts come and go like the sun where ideas surface then sink away to the under hemisphere of my brain. For some reason, my best ideas come as I am falling asleep, when I attempt to distract myself from life just so I can fall into unconsciousness. Last night I came up with the new season plot for ‘24’, it involves sending an inaudible signal pulse through cell phone towers that can cause death to anyone who is currently talking on a cell phone at that time – around 5:58pm, beep, beep, beep, beep, boop. Now that would take out a lot of people, but don’t worry, Jack Bower will save the day and catch the bad guys…maybe, you will have to watch and see – if I ever get a job writing for Fox, which is highly unlikely. But if any of you are writers for a big studio, please ignore all the above comments relating to lack of ideas, I have a plethora of creative and real situations that can be dramatic, comical, or world ending...or all the above. I'm available for freelance work.

But if you look at the ever-expanding exposition they call film and tv, books and magazines, music and, well, music, it can be argued that it, in fact, has all been done before. Look up Barenaked Ladies or the Ryan Montbleau Band, The Forgery, or the large library of volumes covering ways to avoid doing what has been done before. Evidence: the vast motion pictures that are remakes, updates, or regurgitated storylines. Not to mention the copycat films that try to ride the popularity of other successes. See Harry Potter – The Chronicle of Narnia – The Golden Compass, 300 – Beowulf – 10000 BC, Di Vinci Code – National Treasure, and I’m pretty sure every horror movie is based on the same story – like a horror story bible or something. It makes you wonder if we will reach the capacity of human creative thought. Fortunately that looks like it is well off in the future with the advances in technology providing a whole new plethora of inspiration. In fact that could be a movie idea right there. Maybe it can be called “10,000 BCE” – Earth at the year 10,000 where humans are joined by other species with audible communication that can be translated and spoken, the weather is controlled, and no one can come up with a unique idea for a movie, book, or song. One ice age has come and gone, humans survived by going subterranean and cities span below and above ground and discrimination is based on where you live. Of course current undertones and moral questions will arise within the futuristic setting like racism, war and peace, and greed. Done and done. That movie almost writes itself, consider that idea #2 all you Hollywood writers, copyright: me. Consider that a pitch, contact me for script writing employment.

Communi-can't

Well, the world has spun around one rotation to bring us to another day…and another blog.

So since I decided to start this blog a whopping 2 days ago, I have notice myself saying the phrase, “I should blog about this” way too often. Apparently there are a lot of topics that can be blogged about. Because no one in the right mind would actually talk aloud about half the crap they would write about into cyberspace. So here we are, another day, another topic not worth talking about to another human being…

Funny thing was, I was going to write about procrastination, but I’m going to procrastinate on that and write about a topic that just popped into my head…communication. More specifically - the lack of face to face communication in the modern society. I like to consider myself an amateur sociologist since that was my undergraduate major, and since you can’t do anything with that as a major except consider yourself an amateur sociologist, I believe is enough right to expostulate on social communication and the effects of modern technology on social interaction…Sure, why not. So let’s delve, yes let us. So head down to your local College/University in between classes and you will find a disproportionate number of students surgically attached to cell phones and/or iPod devices. I should preface with the fact that I am not here to ridicule those individuals that communicate non-verbally or enjoy listening to music, that would be hypocritical of me, I am merely making observation and hopefully make it humorous. OK, back to the cell phone babies…now I have had the pleasure of working with computers back to Windows 3.1, and I insisted my first computer have a modem so that I could call my friend (who was and still is much more advanced than me in computer wherewithal). So without any ISP I was on my way to peer-to-peer modem dial-up connectivity. Granted back then (early ’92-ish to be specific) computer-to-computer communication was limited, very limited, and I never really got into BBSs because they were like fraternities, you had to know the admin, have something to offer in return, just be granted access to their bulletin boards. Then came the World Wide Web and newsgroups, easily interfaced by using this program called an internet browser: Netscape. Then college = “high speed” internet connection, Pine e-mail, and, wait for it...wait for it, Windows 95! (what a revolution). Pine e-mail was a very basic DOS and Unix based application that allowed users to read messages. Well, the program, as far as I can remember, made you log in each time you wanted to read new message…well, I probably checked that e-mail account about 18 times a minute while in my dorm room first year. That deep blue background would laminate the dark room in a wave of blue colored tinted bliss…until I realized I never had any new mail. About 6% (arbitrary #) of the population used e-mail in ’95 (I found that 29% of households in ’95 accessed the internet, so I’m sort of close). And today? Well, let just say if our University e-mail system goes down for about 5 minutes we’ve got the entire academic, medical, and administrative community calling us for ETAs and how dare we ruin their lives by causing the servers to crash like we did it on purpose. Which brings me back to my observation which I will begin with an anecdote of one such user…

So this woman calls all panicky about not being able to send out e-mails for this important blah, blah, blah. So I tell her that the e-mail servers are acting slow and message sent out may take some time to reach their destinations. And she’s all like, “But I’m just trying send them down the all and around the corner.” As if your distance from the recipient is in direct relation to the time it takes to receive of the e-mail by said recipient. For the uninitiated, its not exactly. Yes, to some degree, but in this case, no. The point being…the recipient is down the hall and around the corner. Its not like she even had to pick up the phone! Just stand up, take 22 steps and see the person – IN PERSON. Alright, another thing you should know about me…I have some weird phobia about calling people on the phone, not talking to people on the phone, just calling. Not to this degree: Phone Phobia, but more like this: “Cold Call Phobia”, so I prefer to talk to people in person…or better yet, by e-mail. But if e-mail is down or unavailable…I prefer to go to the person/store than call. Don’t ask, I don’t know why. I’m sure my friend just think I don’t like them when I never call but that’s not the case. Place that in today’s ultra-cell phone/electronic society and that makes me antiquated. So that should give you some idea where this observation is coming from…but back to the topic at hand, which I have no idea what it is anymore…thanks for playing along.

Oh, right, non-personal communication. IM, text-messaging, E-mail, chat rooms, myspace…blogs (oh the irony) and other non-verbal communication are creating a whole new level of dangers that our younger generation faces with the added accessibility and connectivity to the larger world. Not to mention the distractions when driving, in classes, or walking alone…so what are we to do to protect society from falling into communication overload, attention deficit, and over exposure? That is a tough question to answer but it is certain that technology and teens (and younger) will always be one step ahead of regulation (see file sharing). Cell phones certain have their benefits: protection when walking alone (I know, I’m contradicting myself, but it can act as a deterrent and distraction from your surrounding), calling for emergencies or if lost, etc…we all know what they can do and how they have revolutionized our lives. Children of today will take it for granted and we will be the old geezers talking about the days before cell phones, phone tag, non-caller ID, rotary phones, and quarter pay phones…and actually remember people phone numbers by heart. And I am sure there are endless uses for cell phones that I am completely unaware of, but what will happen when we get to a point where we are talking to people by cell-phone, or atom-phone, or implant-a-phone, to a person right next to us. Or when we don’t recognized our own children when we run into them that one day we just so happen to be in our house at the same time.

On an unrelated note, I recently got a Bluetooth hands-free headset for my cell phone and it totally kicks ass. Now I can blog, chat, e-mail, drive, look pompous, talk on my cell phone, talk to other people, talk to myself without looking crazy, all with this fashionable earpiece dangling from one ear. I highly recommend them. Until tomorrow…unless I procrastinate some more.